This is my friend Teodor.
Teodor is going to Miami for Ultra – the mecca of EDM festivals – in just a few short weeks, and he asked me if I had any thoughts on the lineup and suggestions of who he should see.
Just kidding! He didn’t ask my opinion at all. I told him that when the set times came out, I was going to make him a schedule and he had better stick to it. He told me he would, as long as I made it into a blog post. Well, the Ultra set times are out, and here we are.
Below is Teodor’s carefully crafted Ultra schedule that I’m forcing upon him. These selections were not made lightly; I took into account all the very best music that Ultra has to offer while still considering the artists that I knew he would want to see. This is not just a reflection of my own preferences. I MADE SACRIFICES.
(Side note – do you want a personalized schedule for a music festival you’re going to? I will make you one, free of charge! Not joking – this is fun for me.)
(Double side note – if you go to the Ultra website to look at set times, this is what you get, only slightly larger. Why. Why why why. I could write a whole blog post about how horrible this image is.)
Friday, March 29th
Teodor won’t be at Ultra that day but whatever. Making this list anyway just for completeness’ sake.
5:05pm – Get them tropical house vibes with MATOMA
7:00pm – Check out Rage Against the Machine guitarist TOM MORELLO perform his twisted alt/EDM hybrid album in a performance that is sure to be one of the best of Ultra that will also be the most confusing to attendees who don’t know enough to care about this artist.
9:20pm – ALESSO, because it wouldn’t be Ultra without some solid progressive house.
10:00pm – Seemingly the biggest band in the universe right now, ODESZA
11:15pm – Yo Skrill drop it hard with DOG BLOOD (I would want this slot to be taken by Jai Wolf, but I know he wouldn’t go to that)
12:30am – The Man, the Myth, the Legend – MARSHMELLO
Saturday, March 30th
This is where the real excitement begins.
5:00pm – Odesza junior, AKA PHANTOMS
6:30pm – I have no idea how you’ll react to G JONES but this is far and away the best of this time slot
8:00pm – This is a new collab, but anything that involves Big Gigantic is great so GIGANTIC NGHTMRE it is.
9:30pm – Let GRiZ take you to funkytown (please do not go to Armin Van Buuren or I will end our friendship)
10:55pm – Get some clarity with ZEDD
12:30am – DEADMAU5 and also you must pronounce it “deadmau-FIVE” the entire time
Sunday, March 31st
Last day already? My how the time flies.
8:00pm – If you liked G Jones, you’ll love SPACE JESUS
9:10pm – Apparently this guy is still around – AFROJACK
10:30pm – Resist the urge to go to David Guetta because ERIC PRYDZ is the clear move here.
11:30pm – Everyone’s favorite space mom, REZZ
12:00am – If you must leave Rezz early to go to ARMIN VAN BUUREN, I will permit it but don’t leave toooo early.
Have fun, be safe, and please clear all potential schedule deviations with me in advance. Thank you.